Destination: Wedding
The first thing I did on the day of the wedding was leap out of bed and check the weather. I always do that when I'm part of an outside event, which is stupid, because no matter how quickly I check it, I won't be able to change or control it. It's just a silly habit. Much to the relief of all eighty guests and the bride and groom, though, the weather was surpassingly gorgeous. Incidentally, how kick ass is it that so many people came to LB's destination wedding?? I don't think I could round up eighty guests if they all lived within five miles of the church!
Since we got up around noon, it was already past time to hit the water when we made it down to the beach. We were fortunate enough to snag two chairs (the competition was vicious for those suckers) right near K, and settled in happily to sip froo froo drinks and get some color. I got a little too much color, and ended up lobster red on my chest and shoulders. I just got cocky. I was thinking that being so much farther away from the equator meant that the tropical sun had nothing new to teach me. I thought, "I got this!" Well, the tropical sun certainly did have new things to teach me, and it schooled my ass good. I was frizzled to a crisp. Talk about being hot for teacher, hee! The only thing that made me feel even a little bit better was that eveyone else was similarly affected. Still, it was a jackass move. I should have known better than anyone else what burn your skin o'clock would do to me; after all, I was the one with the island experience.
Our late start meant that there wasn't much free time before we had to head back up to the room and get ready for the wedding. After rushing around like loons, PIC and I glided serenely back down to the gazebo on the beach where it was going to be held. I know I raved before about how gorgeous the resort was, but it bears repating. It was so goddamn picturesque, and the gazebo was one of the prettiest spots on the gounds. They had it decorated just beautifully; it was really lovely. Everyone was so excited, snapping pictures and waiting anxiously for the bride to appear. I have to say that this groom looked a lot more relaxed than the last one. When LB finally arrived, it became clear that her guests weren't the only ones who were thrilled about the wedding; she had picked up an entourage of bathingsuited hangers on. D noticed that one guy in a speedo actually sprinted over so that he would be in time to take a primo shot of the bride. It was crazy - a total paparazzi move. I was very glad that by the time the father of the bride was giving her away all the uninvited gawkers had lost interst and sauntered away. The acutal wedding ceremony was sweet and funny; it was wonderful to see my Philly girl so happy.
After the ceremony was over, Dominican Lou (the official wedding photog) herded the newly wedded couple and all their guests down to the water's edge for lots and lots of pictures. There was a stray dog kind of hanging around on the fringes of the party, and jumping into the picture from time to time. Some thought it funny, but I wanted to kick that mangy thing into the next country. I know that's not very nice of me, but all I could think about was how I would feel if it were my wedding. He eventually scrammed, with much encouragement to do so, and all the pics that needed to be taken, were.
I was surprised to see that the reception was going to be on the beach, thinking that somthing like that would be messy and difficult. It wasn't like that at all. The tables were set up beautifully and everything was just really well done. It was an inspired choice. Once we (there were about nine of us who palled around all weekend) got settled at a table, it was time to have a drink! D and I had a master plan to drink only beer and keep things in control, but that went all to hell when we discovered that no such animal existed at this wedding. So, booze it was. I made the mistake of being nice to the bartenders, and they, in return, poured my drinks generously. I appreciated the sentiment, but the results were not pretty.
Unwisely, I chose to drink rum, which for some reason always sneaks up on me. You know, the kind of drunk that happenes when there's no stage between completely sober and trainwreck. It's much, much harder to regulate your drinking when you don't have buzzy warning signals to gauge by. Sigh. Anyway, we were having a good old time, eating delicious food, drinking adult beverages and dancing strange line dances. The dancing was my fave part, though having never danced on sand before, I hadn't known what a good workout it was. Once we attacked the non-English speaking DJ with our iPods, people really got up in groups and started to move. LB was holding court in the center of it all, and eveyone was having a blast. I was still fine at this point, and pretty much for all of the dancing. It was when people kind of spread out onto the beach that I lost it. The limbo is the last thing I remember. If you look at pictures of me after that, you can see that nobody is home in my eyes. That's never good.
I was able to piece the rest of the night together from both my pictures and witness accounts. Apparently the dog came back to a much warmer reception, the boys all jumped in the water, and my partner in crime wandered off to follow her own agenda. I drifted off myself, and Annflan had to have a couple of the boys to go find me in the lobby, where I was doing a perfect impression of a lost lamb (and probably about as smart as one). She then took me up to the room, where instead of going to bed, I decided to change and come back out. Annflan washed her hands of me, and I went right back to the beach so that I could pass out in the "wounded solidiers" area. Thankfully for my pride, I was not even close to the only one in bad shape.
I probably was the only one who had to be tucked in twice, though. Just by sheer luck, K and E found me on a beach chair passed the fuck out (shocker), and in a completely different outfit than anyone had seen me wearing at the wedding. They were puzzled by this, but decided that no matter what had happened, I really needed to go to bed. Thanks for your help, ladies. Like my angels of mercy, I was unsure of my outfit when I woke up in the morning, and also of why I was wearing it to sleep in. Deciding that I would find out later, I changed into my jammies and passed back out.
Despite my spectacular descent into sheer drunkinness,it was a practically perfect night. I hope the bride had as much fun as all of her guests did. Congrats, baby!
