1 post tagged “loss”

Yesterday a man that I've never met, a man who had better PRAY TO GOD that I never meet him, stole something from me.  He stole my friend Micaela away by driving drunk.  But much, much worse than that, he stole her whole life from her.  She was only twenty-four, with the world at her feet.  But she never woke up after the crash, just laid in a coma for a week before slipping away from those who loved her.

And who wouldn't love her?  She was funny and bright, so vivacious that life seemed to shine a little more brightly in her that it did in other people.  She came to this island with Camp A, and I remember immediately clicking with her.  By the end of the summer we were joking that we were sisters under the skin.  God that was a great summer.  I can't believe that in the blink of an instant someone who shared that with me is gone.  Just like that.  AND FOR NO FUCKING GOOD REASON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've cried and cried, but mostly what I feel is rage.  This was completely preventable, completely sensless, completely pointless.  All that asshole had to do was not drive drunk.  That's it.  Instead, the life of a crazy, awesome, lovely girl has been snuffed out.  Now she'll never get married and have babies, won't have the chance to really live, she'll never do anything else.  Because he drove drunk and killed her.

I meant this post to be a tribute to her life.  She was someone who lived every moment to the fullest, with joy and exuberance.  I think I'm still too angry for that, though.  I'm just so angry, and stunned.  It had been a little while since we talked last, and I find myself wondering, did I tell her I loved her?  I guess I thought we had all the time in the world to say our important things to each other.  Who thinks that their friend is going to die before she gets the chance to really even live?  Maybe later I'll be able to remember all the things she did do, but right now I can't.  Right now I feel like boarding a plane to Portland and going and killing that motherfucker.  He, of course, walked away from the crash fine.

Life isn't very fair sometimes.